The Faux wine snob needs a cork in his …

Sex Kitten is still courting The Storyteller like he’s a babe in a stroller. I’m having a hard time getting over the fact that I was having sex with my first boyfriend and he was in diapers – it’s creepy.  I made dinner for the three of us and proceeded to down a bottle of Ménage à Trois at the dinner table. Fucking irony in a bottle!

One of my pet peeves is “faux snobs” that think they know everything about quality wines and beers and yet they pour themselves a Bud Light or a Sutter Home White Zinfandel. Classy, real classy. Does your mobile home have “rims” buddy? And he was desperately trying to convince me that Guinness is a great beer … after I already agreed on that fact. He must be Sherlock Fucking Holmes.

One of the first things in the dinner conversation was The Storyteller‘s previous endeavors as a “stripper”. I almost spit my wine out of my nose. He’s the furthest thing I’ve seen from stripper material I’ve ever seen in my lifetime. Do they work for pennies here? Half pennies? He did mention he hated tomatoes … now I know why. I would be throwing them at him for sure.

After that crazy dinner I lamented the fact that I have 4 married men that would fuck me, but yet no real promising single men waiting in the shadows. It’s getting a bit frustrating now. I desperately logged into my online dating accounts and returned some messages tonight. I guess I’ll see where that goes – they are all normal looking Americans.

~Globe Trotter in Lingerie

p.s. I forgot to give Sex Kitten the Bad Decision Tiara (BDT) back … she’s surely earned it on this one. Interesting that she can’t come up with a blog post but yet I’ve never heard a kind word spoken about him. Hmmmm?

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