The best thing about playing the dating game is all the people you get to meet and new things to experience. They are all different. Some I cling to emotionally but never have a real sexual connection with; and others I have wild sex dreams about but cringe when I’m with them because they lack personality and intelligence. There’s only been a few that impress me on all levels.
I often find myself wishing I could take bits and pieces from each of them and create The Ideal Man – not to be confused with The Perfect Man, which I’m convinced does not exist.
The French Man is confident, elusive, sarcastic, intelligent and easy to talk to. Physically he is tall, very strong and fit and has a ton of hair on his head. Like me, he’s non-religious, childless, well-traveled and career-focused; and goes through life like a responsible, conservative adult. He will take me to dinner and share a bottle of wine or have a beer with me. He loves various foods and is a great cook. And my dog loves him. He’s very sensual sexually and is usually just as horny as I am. The irony is that he’s also a commitment-phobe like myself. He’s never been married and I don’t think he really ever wants to be. His work keeps him out of town and I don’t see him very often., which minimizes my chances of becoming emotionally attached to him.
The Egyptian Man was all about material things and had a fragile ego that took on a life of its own. He was confident and professional and treated me to the nicest material things I could ever imagine. He was lazy and uneventful when it came to sex – I did all the work “cowgirl style” and he was useless otherwise. His religious beliefs scared me and he was the “immediately committed” type because he talked about engagement and marriage within 6 months of meeting me. He was the exact opposite of what my ex-husband was and it was a refreshing “flip” for my emotions to take – but he was not ideal.
The Bartender was a good ‘ole American man (Eeek!) and he is damn close to ideal. He is kind, a gentleman, very prideful, confident, funny, intelligent, makes me laugh, keeps me humble, is a great family man, works hard and is very trustworthy. Physically he’s an average height and build, bald and extremely cute. He has an infectious smile and gets along with anyone in the room. He was amazing in the sack and gained professional league status of the Double Orgasm the first night we had sex. It’s really too bad he always felt more like a friend than a lover. We still see each other around town and it’s always pleasant but never more than polite chit chat.
So what is The Ideal Man for me? Someone that can put up with my sarcasm, brutal honesty, independence, gift for breaking the rules, excessive happiness, infectious giggle and serious sexual drive. There’s some things that really turn me on about a man … being tall, strong forearms, sexy calves, emotional eyes, charismatic smile, bald head and a “bad boy” look. Their employer might not agree, but not shaving for a few days is sexy as hell. I have a sweet spot for crazy outdoor adventures, Harleys, “muscle” and sports cars and planes – anything with power. I like a little “attitude” and don’t mind occasional disagreements, it’s always worth the “makeup” sex.
He should be a lover of animals, socially outgoing enough to have a good time, humble, confident and a great kisser. I’m really turned on by a man’s voice, if it’s right and I can tell instantly what kind of mood they are in. It would be fabulous to find someone who shares my passion for visual creativity or at least appreciates it. He must also be a gentleman – it’s really appealing to have a door opened for me, led through somewhere first and always introduced politely to people in public. He should appreciate and respect various foods, lifestyles, ways of life and races – being “worldly” is how I would describe it.
So this is where everyone just shakes their head and says “good luck finding that”. I will, eventually, and I’ll be having tons of fun along the way!